The etymology of piracy

This was the second half of my reply to PaulC’s comment on my previous Pirate Bay post, but I thought it was an interesting enough thought to warrant it’s own post instead.

Taking something that doesn't belong to you is called theft. Thieves can be sympathetic individuals with all kinds of potential motivation. They could be nice guys with no job and eight kids. Stealing bread makes me a thief, because I took your stuff.

Declaring the unjustness of the government and saying "we're not English anymore" is called rebellion (not revolution). A rebel can also be sympathetic, depending on his motivation. A rebellion can be started "because taxation without representation isn't fair" or because a bunch of guys who want to be the new aristocracy want to stir up the public to make it happen (hmmmmm...). Saying "I don't live by your rules anymore" makes me a rebel.

The dissemination of intellectual property without compensation to its originator is not called "theft." It's not called "rebellion." It's called "piracy." Pirate = bad. There's no ambiguity. Pirates are drunkards and rapists who take what they want and will probably kill you to get it. They are motivated by greed 100% of the time. Making a backup copy of a movie to which I have bought the right to view makes me a pirate. Removing the copy protection from a computer game so I don't have to swap CDs every ten minutes makes me a pirate.

So because I'm guilty of what ought to be considered a "white-collar" crime (but I'm not taking anyone's money, no one’s life is being ruined because of me, and I don't drive a Porsche), I'm the same as those guys who hi-jacked that boat a couple months ago. I guess that makes sense, since they killed a bunch of people and stole a bunch of stuff, and I... killed a lot of... time. And I stole... umm... nothing. And I hurt... nobody. But because the government is a slave to the MAFIAA (their real name), who wants me to shell out fifty bucks every time I scratch a disc, I'm a pirate. I guess I should feel lucky they're not calling me an "intellectual property rapist."

What recession?

I know I’ll get some comments on this, and that’s exactly what I’m hoping for.

What the hell is everybody complaining about? Okay. I can see what the filthy rich have to complain about. They’ve lost money on the stock market, and are still ridiculously wealthy. I can see what big corporations like Wal-Mart and the Home Depot have to complain about. They’ve raised their prices almost not at all, have eliminated almost no jobs, and have lost almost no business (that from my own personal experiences at the depot).

Gas prices seem to be fairly stable, my electric bill has only gone down since I moved out of Troy two (three?) years ago, and I still don’t pay taxes. Okay, this year I’ll be paying taxes, but that’s not the point.

I have two questions here.

1. What the hell is everybody going off the wall about? A couple of companies that had no sense of how to operate in a free market went under. Somebody call the waaaaaa-mbulance. Yeah. I know that cost people jobs, but GM ond… (I’ve already forgotten the other one, that’s how upsetting it is)… didn’t have a lot of factories in this country (correct me if I’m wrong), and the two largest employers in the world (Wal-Mart and Home Depot) are still hugely US-centered, and are HIRING! The Home Depot is desperate for people! The amount of money they’re throwing at their employees, pretty much just for showing up, is extraordinary!

In three years of being officially classified as “poverty” (meaning I paid no income tax), I never once felt the “sting” of our “faltering economy.” In the past year, I’ve bought a 37” LCD television, a blu-ray player, a Nintendo Wii, and most recently, a PC that will eat yours for a light snack. And I saw Star Trek in DLP four times. In short, I’m making “barely enough money to live on,” (a little over 30k between my wife and me) and I’m living like a king. What is everybody whining about?

2. Why don’t I pay any taxes? I’m not saying I want to give somebody my money, but it’s really not fair, is it? It’s not fair that some people give up to thirty-five percent of their paycheck to the federal government and I don’t give them anything. I think the illustrious Sam Seaborn says it best:

Henry, last fall, every time your boss got on the stump and said, "It's time for the rich to pay their fair share," I hid under a couch and changed my name. I left Gage Whitney making $400,000 a year. Which means I paid twenty-seven times the national average in income tax. I paid my fair share. And the fair share of twenty-six other people. And I'm happy to 'cause that's the only way it's gonna work. And it's in my best interest that everybody be able to go to schools and drive on roads. But I don't get twenty-seven votes on Election Day. The fire department doesn't come to my house twenty-seven times faster, and the water doesn't come out of my faucet twenty-seven times hotter. The top one percent of wage earners in this country pay for twenty-two percent of this country. Let's not call them names while they're doing it is all I'm saying.

That was nine years ago and numbers change, but the point is still valid. I dunno. MY first question was the important one. It just led to this one.

So I honestly want to know what’s going on and why I should care. Somebody please comment. And yes, I’ve been reading the news, and I know (roughly) what things are happening on a large scale. I guess my larger concern is “umm… So?”